About: Judith Costello

Name: Judith Costello
Website: http://www.parentingwithspirit.com
Details: A certified art therapist, Judith is the author of numerous articles and books on parenting and child development, including Zen Parenting. She writes from Moriarty, New Mexico.

Posts by Judith Costello:

Things that change…and things that stay the same

Thursday, October 15th, 2009
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Curiosity Kitten and the Donkey, by Brigit, age 10

The annual cycle of transition from summer to fall is upon us and everything seems different. Many things change, but much remains the same. I used to tell people, “The only thing you can count on in life is that it changes.” But farm life is a good lesson in the cyclical nature of everything.

Here’s my list of the top three things that stay the same:
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Horse Therapy

Wednesday, August 26th, 2009

Our ten-year-old is sure the horse can read her mind.brigit and tory painting

This horse story began when Brigit was in charge of the household while her brother and I flew off to Washington, DC. Her stepdad was at home with her. But Jurgen’s had health problems and he doesn’t have energy for cooking, cleaning or barnyard chores. So they went out to eat a lot and Brigit took over doing everything else. She rose to the challenge with commendable grace.

During those five days, she took three feral cats into town to get them spayed. She cleaned up after the six rescue cats who are still in cages. She fed and cared for our other animals. She fixed breakfast and lunches. Then she vacuumed and straightened the house. Just before we arrived home she whipped up a “Welcome Home” cake.
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Further Cat Tales

Thursday, June 4th, 2009

Cute little kittenThere are two kinds of cat people in our neighborhood. First, are the cowboys who believe cats were created for the sole purpose of controlling the spread of mice in barns and woodpiles. Period. Second, are the animal lovers who feel bad for the critters who are out there fighting, scrounging and multiplying. An animal-lover’s heartstrings pull every time she sees the inbreeding that leads to death, neurotic behavior or diseased kittens.

Nine-year-old Brigit falls into the second category. And that’s why we are now taking care of three abandoned mama cats. (We only had two mommies at last writing, but they are multiplying!) Little did we realize how much cat food, cat litter and poop scooping this project was going to require! And there’s heartache too.
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Fighting for Life (A Kitten Story)

Thursday, April 30th, 2009

My daughter’s science project looks at the exponentialtiny-baby-are-you-breathing numbers involved when a single feral cat gets pregnant producing up to twenty kittens in a year. Then the kittens produce kittens and the colony expands. We have trapped two mommies and the drama has begun.

But the gift of life is still a breathtaking wonder to behold!

The cat Brigit calls Spot, gave birth to five babies. By the time we checked on her in the barn cage, one kitten had been shoved away. It was cold and limp. Lifeless. Brigit didn’t want to touch it. Death is a fearful thing. But I gently eased the body of the little Calico out of the cage and rubbed it.

If only it weren’t so cold. If only I could rub it back into life.

As I massaged the little fur ball it began to move, ever so slightly. All we knew for sure was that it wasn’t dead—yet! That was enough to change everything. Nine-year-old Brigit hopped on her bike to get help from a neighbor who is an expert on cats.
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The Gift of a Story

Friday, January 30th, 2009

Our neighbor is 96 years old and she still goes for a walk severalchicken-petting times each week. Very slowly she makes her way along the pasture fence between our properties. Then she turns around and goes home, carefully avoiding the ruts in the dirt road.  I have gone out to greet her only occasionally.

A simple hello always means a commitment to thirty minutes, or more, of conversation. I know that’s not much in the larger scheme of things. And, it means so much to older people when you give them the gift of time. But these days life seems to be all a rush and time is a precious commodity. Often my husband reminds me that I’m not keeping up with everything I have committed to do. I get stingy.

That’s why I’m pleased to share what I’ve learned about another gift we can give each other. It’s the gift of Story. Yes, it takes time. But it’s fun too and it fuels the imagination. Here’s how I learned about it.
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The Seven Wonders of a Life

Thursday, January 15th, 2009

writingMy daughter just finished a book called The Seven Wonders of Sassafras Springs. In the story a boy is challenged to search out the Wonders in his small, seemingly-boring town. Like the boy in the story, it reminded me of how often I overlook the things that can inspire awe in the daily routines of life. But Brigit, age 9, was willing to take the novel character’s challenge. Within two days she wrote down The Seven Wonders of Brigit Brown.

Her Wonders began nine years ago with a twenty-four hour plane trip. She was born in Vietnam and had appeared in dreams for three years before her birth. I was living in Florida with my husband and young son. I flew around the world to bring her home when she was only 4½ months old.
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A Digital-Free Barnyard

Thursday, December 18th, 2008

By Jurgen Haver

Editors Note: Jurgen Haver is the husband of Judith Costello, one of Lehman’s Country Life long time contributors.

Just this week I read the results of three research studies. The first said the average child spends 45 hours a week in the digital world (cell phone, TV, games, texting, computer). Next was a study that concluded cell phones and e-mails help children socialize better. The last one was convinced that all of these digital tools were changing the way young people’s brains actually work and was probably not a good thing.

So, as I often do, I went out and talked to my animals about it. You can trust animals, you know. Here’s what I learned:
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Being Real

Thursday, November 20th, 2008

By Jurgen Haver

Editors Note: Jurgen Haver is the husband of Judith Costello, one of Lehman’s Country Life long time contributors.

I went to New York as a young man, with dreams of becoming the next great American novelist! Living in the big city, I noticed something about what makes people “real”.

At that time, I was hanging around people who thought of themselves as “cultured”. At literary gatherings and art shows the conversation always seemed to revolve around which authority you could quote. Nothing was said about what they personally believed. It was always a quoting contest. “So-and-so recently said…”
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The Gift of a Chicken Story

Wednesday, November 5th, 2008

Our neighbor is 96 years old and she still goes for a walk several times each week. Very slowly she makes her way along the pasture fence between our properties. Then she turns around and goes home, carefully avoiding the ruts in the dirt road.  I have gone out to greet her only occasionally.

A simple hello always means a commitment to thirty minutes, or more, of conversation. I know that’s not much in the larger scheme of things. And, it means so much to older people when you give them the gift of time. But these days life seems to be all a rush and time is a precious commodity. Often my husband reminds me that I’m not keeping up with everything I have committed to do. I get stingy.

That’s why I’m pleased to share what I’ve learned about another gift we can give each other. It’s the gift of Story. Yes, it takes time. But it’s fun too and it fuels the imagination. Here’s how I learned about it.
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Good Neighbors

Thursday, September 25th, 2008

Have I ever mentioned that we call our place “Sagging Acres”? The fences are sagging, the barn roof is sagging, the horse’s back is sagging and the adult humans’ energy is sagging. There is so much work to do here it makes me tired just thinking about it! I read stories about single women who build their own houses and maintain huge pieces of property and…well, it is unimaginable to me!So when we experienced some recent problems, we learned a big lesson. We are never alone. And God intended for us to work together.

I was gone for a short vacation with the children when Jurgen, my husband, fell. He was in the backyard feeding the dogs and stumbled on something. He hit his head on the wall of the house and lost consciousness. The day had been a rainy one, so we didn’t expect anyone to be dropping by.
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